I told her almostall of my life. I told her that at about five I was with mom in somedepartment store while she was in the lingerie department and I feltlike a girl while we were there. I explained that as a child it wasdifficult for me to cuddle a toy solder because that doll was toting agun. I explained to her my disappointment when at the age of eleven,instead of getting puffy on my chest my voice was deepening.I was also scared back then. Afraid of someone finding out. Afraid thatsomeone who did find out would attack me or at least ridicule me. I wasalso afraid that I would be caught dressed in mom?s clothes. The strangest thing is that the others knew. For example, I came in thirdfor best looking girl in my senior year. The one who won was alreadytransitioning.I was actually attacked at the age of twelve by a boy who goosed mejust because he wanted to find out if I was a boy or girl. When hefound out he laughed. He laughed as I lay on the ground protectingmyself. The physical. After my parents went to bed, we would walk around the house and even go outside in the buff. It felt free and naughty; I loved it. I also loved the feel of naked flesh. I would run my hands over the bodies of my friends. I would lie on top of them and rub our bodies together. We were pre-pubescent and it was a strange erotic thrill to feel flesh on flesh. Because we would sometimes see their older siblings with their boyfriends making out, I started to pretend we were a boy-girl couple. I would get on top of Steve or Charlie and call them by their sister’s name and kiss them, rubbing our little penises together as we did so. As time progressed, we managed to see both Charlie's sister Kate and Steve’s sister Lisa with their boyfriends. We watched the progression from kissing, to dry humping, to masturbating, to oral sex. Watching Lisa give her boyfriend a blow job through the window was one of the most exciting moments of my young life. Then one time Charlie and I watched Kate and.
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