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‘Not only with her beautify but with her obedience.’ I was not ready for this. Both Mr. Damon and Mr. Compton had made it clear to me after they first took me that I was in fact their property now, but I don’t think I completely understood until just this minute. I knew that I had not actually given myself as property to Mr. Damon and Mr. Compton, as I had to Derrick. This was far different. No, I hadn’t ‘given’ myself to them, they had simply taken me. It’s very hard for me to explain, even to myself, but when Mr. Damon raped me, I understood that he did so because he knew he could. He wanted me, and the fact that I was married meant nothing to him. He took what he wanted, and he wanted me. My husband sadly was unable to protect me. Simply put, a more powerful man had taken what he had and now owned it in ways Joey could never emulate. And in truth, I was more naturally bound now to Mr. Damon and Mr. Compton than to Derrick. What I gave I to Derrick I could take back. But what was. I was told I could put on my first bra and panties without an audience,in the privacy of my own bedroom, on the basis that I then opened the doorand came out of my room so my Mum and Sister could see I was wearing it.This wouldn't be the first time a member of the family wandered round thehouse wearing only lingerie as Trudy and Mum often did.It was just the first time I was forced to parade round the house lessthan fully clothed, let alone wearing a girl's underwear, as I opened mydoor so they could see that I would be a good boy or rather a good girlnow.I think the description "like a sheep before the shearer" would havedescribed me well at that point. It was truly humiliating to stand beforemy Mum and sister wearing lingerie. I was worried if I put another footwrong Mum would take matters further."It looks like Julianne's wearing a boy's bra and panties Mummy," Trudyteased. "Because she's got a blue bow on both."I didn't dare point out boys don't wear bras and panties for fear.
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