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”Michael was going to have to be beaten to tell Susan.“I see, I think it must be Selsey Bill.”Michael looked up now, staring at Susan, he had absolutely no idea what she was talking about.“Selsey Bill is on the coast in an area called the Manhood Peninsula.”Michael’s mouth dropped open, she had guessed, well he thought she had.“When your mother and I were at school we had a boy known to everyone as Donkey. Is this your secret to success?”Michael nodded but still refused to talk about it to his aunt, who he knew would talk to his mother.Susan was getting aroused, she was trying to imagine her nephew, sitting here beside her, and he was the local Stud. She forgot about being related, she became a woman and this was not a boy but a young man. “Let me guess, nine inches?”Michael was now blushing profusely.“No, normal length roughly.”OK, so maybe fat, thick?”Michael nodded, keeping silent, too embarrassed.“I want to see it.”Michael looked up so quickly he nearly ricked his neck. He stared. “Nothing.” I told her defensively. “It’s just ... the way you look.”“The way I ... LOOK?”“Well, yeah ... I mean...”She let the paper drop on the table and focused her full attention on me. I shut up, swallowed hard and shifted my weight around on that hand grenade.“And how, exactly, do I... ‘LOOK’?”I guessed we weren’t finished with the bullshit after all. I somehow felt that maybe she should be reading a copy of, I’m OK You’re OK or Sybil or maybe something on the terrors of PMS, instead of the morning paper. Maybe a couple of pamphlets on anger management would be nice.{On a side-bar: Mom isn’t like this with just me, she gives Dad his appropriate share of bitching when needed. Evidently, I was getting the lion’s share. She wasn’t always like this. I’m not sure what happened to spawn this version of my mom but I remember a time when she was relatively pleasant and caring most of the time. I think I was in the fifth or sixth grade... }“Well, you look really...” She stared me down “.
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