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" Hmm, "girl" or"woman"? The writer in me decided that the word choice of a, (what wasI then twelve?), a twelve year old was a semantic problem. I didn'tknow back then that I should have said, "Identify as a trans woman." SoI penciled in an edit. Next I realized that "twenty-five" when used tomean an age, was not a singular point in time. It covered a full year,365 days! It was not too late!I've known for sometime that I could start HRT (letter from mytherapist or by informed consent). So, determined not to waste one moreminute, I looked up clinic locations and made an appointment for thatafternoon. Next I decided that I needed help and that I needed friends.So I searched for transgender support groups. I was having troublefiguring out what were really support groups and what weren't. So Icalled mom. She never throws away anything. She'll have the number forthe therapist I went to.I called the number that mom found, but my old therapist had moved, butfortunately my records hadn't. I. Is it still all right to call you Tommy? You're a man now so maybe I should call you Tom or Thomas." No, Mom, Tommy's still O.K. Dad was Tom and I'm Tommy."She cooed in pleasure from what I was doing to her tits. "I don't want you to think you are a substitute for him although you are very similar to him. I can't say I didn't wonder what you'd feel like inside me, Tommy. All those nights we slept together and I felt your cock poking my ass made me think about you as more than a son. More than once I thought about you making love to me. They were really just idle thoughts. Have you thought about making love to me, Tommy?" I always thought you were pretty, Mom. Even tonight, before we went down here, I was looking at your butt when your back was turned to me." Thank you, baby," she said. "I guess I never thought I'd actually go through with it. Perhaps it's natural for a mother to think of her son that way or vice versa. I guess I was just so frightened that I needed your strength and.
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