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“Are you going to tell different jokes?” “I will if I do the show.” She told me she wanted to hear more of my material, and that she’d try to encourage her husband not to come. Also, all the meetings and talks were apparently running late and some of the top executives, her husband included, might be working during the show. That’s right. Mr. Asshole would be working during my comedy show, the one his wife so thoroughly enjoyed… In my dreams, right? At least it was fun to think about. Fast forward to Thursday. I talked with the company’s event manager and, to my surprise, managed to successfully get my set cancelled that night and just take half pay. A couple of hours later, while I was killing the afternoon at the bar, Mr. Asshole stops by and makes some snarky remark to me about how maybe I’ll be allowed to come back next year if I get a little funnier, and he patted me on the back as he headed off to his next event. This fucking guy. And about half an hour after that, Chelsea. Sorry, I’m just feeling overwhelmed right now, but don’t worry. I meant what I said right before we got on the bus this morning one-hundred-and-ten percent,” I said quietly as I tried to tell her with my eyes what I really wanted to say, but there were too many other kids around.“Okay, come on, spunky,” she said, tugging at me by the hand.We got to Ms. Jenner’s classroom, and indeed, it was empty. Grabbing a couple of seats in the back corner, we sat facing each other. We both started eating our lunch (I was starving by that point). I made it a habit to never miss a meal, or extra meals, or snacks, or even snacks with meals. My Mom liked to say that I was her walking grocery bill and that all her pay went to keep me fed—just like the farmers’ horses. Sometimes she threatened to just get me a supply of animal feed because it would have been cheaper.“So tell me, big Bro, what’s eating you, huh? Are you really truly sure that it’s not us that’s bothering you? And that you’re just not.
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