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But what I didn’t think about or want to admit to myself is what I was willing to do so he would like me. I went from being a virgin, who had hardly even kissed a boy to a girl who would do anything to make him happy. I am so ashamed of the things I have done, everything from giving him head, to sex with him, and all the way to giving oral to other guys and even having sex with other guys he asked me to be with. I tried to talk my way out of it but he didn’t listen to it and I let him talk me into doing all types of things with all types of people. I had threesomes with him and his best friend, and another with him and his ex-girlfriend. I was willing to do whatever it took to please him no matter how it made me feel. So that night I went to that hotel not knowing who would be there, but pretty sure someone else might be. I’m not saying that I wasn’t raped, but I know I have to change how I’m acting because if I don’t I will continue to be a victim. But there is probably one. ‘Okay, Mrs. Roberts, how do you want to do this?’ I asked. ‘Will you quit calling me Mrs. Roberts when we’re alone. You make me feel like an old lady. Call me Maggie like in that song by Rod Stewart.’ I thought about that song. It was about an older woman and a younger man. I bought it shortly after Mark’s wedding. It was part of my fantasy and I played it when thinking about Maggie. ‘The morning sun, when it’s in your face, really shows your age But that don’t worry me none. In my eyes you’re everything. I laughed at all of your jokes, my love, you didn’t need to coax Oh, Maggie, I couldn’t have tried any more. You lured me away from home, just to save you from being alone. You stole my soul and that’s a pain I can do without.’ ‘Jerry, are you alright? You look like you were in some deep thoughts,’ said Maggie. ‘No, just thinking about that song you mentioned. I listen to it often,’ I answered. ‘Well, let’s get this mattress moved. You probably have a thousand things to do today.’.
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