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" "Take it slowly," Lisa tried to persuade, "you are new to this existence thing. It is harder than you think." "No I am not!" the deity replied, "I am the prime mover, remember? I am older than the universe, older than existence itself. This is not the natal ennui you mistake it for. This is my mid-life existential crisis and you have imagined me to be infinite in time and space, I am two billion years into it already and because I am fucking prescient, I also know that I have another ten billion to come." Lisa felt terrible, "But I believe in you? Why are you still here?" "It isn't just you, it's your audience. Eight million, six hundred thousand streams. Number one hashtag on Twitter. They still think I am a clever hoax." "Can't an omnipotent deity persuade them otherwise?" "Perhaps I can." the pasta replied, "Do I have your permission?" Lisa nodded, not quite understanding what the deity was planning. A noodly appendage shot out from the mass, wrapping itself around her waist,. I pressed the fastest button for a couple of seconds. Karolina let a yelp out & dropped to the seat behind her instantly. "Are you ok miss,do you need a doctor"? Asked the assistant. "No,just have a bit of stomach ache,I'll be ok" said Karolina,looking at me & shaking her head.This made me laugh as other assistants came to her aid. By now there were two female & three male assistants around her. I took the remote & started on vibrate,middle speed. I could see she was sitting back,holding her leg's tight together. I hit the pump button, this causes a ripple effect along the shaft. She lets another yell out, the assistants begin to panic a little,so I turn it back down to slow. She had quite a crowd around her by the time she had composed herself. "I'm ok, honestly I am fine,just need some fresh air" she said getting to her feet"Oh there you are babe's, are you ok,what's happened"? I ask running to her with concern."I'm going to kill you" she mumbled to me as I put my arm around.
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