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" I sat downin the barber type chair. Andrea had left momentarily to select the box ofstarter earrings. "Mom," I said softly. "I'm your son, remember?" Mom hadn't heard a wordI'd said or, if she had, she ignored me. Soon Andrea returned and showedus the choices that were available. "Oh look Joan!" Mom exclaimed. "They have exactly what you wanted!" What I wanted? What I wanted was to escape this entire situation withoutany more holes in my ears. Andrea and Mom exchanged a secret smile. Momselected the earrings which were the same design as those I was alreadywearing but a tad smaller. She then proceeded to mark my ears with thefelt tipped pen making sure that the new sites would align with thosealready there. SNAP went the gun in my left ear. As had happened lastweek, the clerk came around and made sure that the holes would alignperfectly. Satisfied she walked around and I heard the gun go SNAP! onceagain. I was beginning to miss myself. That may sound insane, but it's true. Ifound. With the "Good Girls" in my class I was the perfect date. I was a gentleman, they never had to worry about improper behavior from me. They could go out with me, we would have a great time and I would bring them back home perfectly intact with a gentle kiss on the cheek as I left. I never had a case of raging hormones that would prompt bad behavior because I was always taking care of some horny "friend".One of my most memorable "dates" was with a girl about a year older than me. She came up behind me as I was walking home from school. She introduced herself as Ava. She had been talking to a friend of hers who had told her about me. She took me by the arm and led me to her house. Along the way we talked about why she wanted to do this. It seemed that she had always been a good girl and that she had had several boyfriends in the past but had not gone beyond the kissing and feeling stages. She just wasn't ready. Well now she was and she wanted to be with someone who knew what he was.
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