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We can't go backwards from here if you come out now."I'd never been less sure of anything in my whole life, but a reached across and took his smooth stubble-less jaw in my hand and kissed him. He tasted like he looked, caramel and chocolate, and that was how our mothers came out of the house to find us, making out on the pavement like the teenagers we were.The next hour passed in a bit of a blur, but there was a lot of shouting. Pete stayed and tried to calm things down, and Maxie's mother called him things that made Maxie scream at her for all he was worth. I held on to Maxie. When I kissed him I had settled on a very simple strategy that I wouldn't let go of him until a solution had been sorted out, and Maxie seemed much better equipped to sort out this problem than I was. I let Maxie answer all the questions, pushed myself against him so that he brought an arm around me, and stood there, leaning into his solid form and waiting for the worst to be over.All that weekend we talked. ’ ‘It was the addiction Misha. The drugs, the drink. Stop blaming yourself.’ Shaking his head he looked at his friend sitting opposite him in the noisy bar. ‘I’ll never feel for anyone what I felt for her. She made me feel alive, made me feel as if my body was on a natural high just being with her….the highs were so high, the lows so low….she just had to look at me and I would burn up with need….no woman has ever made me feel like that….and never will.’ ‘Yes they will…you’ll meet the right one Misha…and when you do you’ll know…the right one will make you want to look after her, make you happy, make you feel complete…Suzanne wasn’t the one….she was an addiction for you…just like the drugs and drink was for her….but the relationship was not healthy. When you meet the right one Misha you’ll know.’ ‘Will I John? Or will I always be looking for Suzanne in every woman I meet?’ Picking up his glass he drained it and stood up, ‘Want another?’ and walking over to the bar his hand dipping into.
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