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I am branch manager at two decent-sized banks in nearby, also decent-sized, villages, and I cannot go in local bars or taverns because inevitably someone will recognize me, later gossip, but seek investment tips or help with a loan or mortgage application. And, of course, bank executives do not buy drinks or make passes at lovely ladies sitting on barstools in those taverns. Which is one reason why I haven't remarried. Or maybe I am just a bit gun shy, for my future wife and I met in college, the marriage lasted not quite seven years, and I should have realized the quiet beauty of the village could not overcome the glamour of the affluent suburbia that had been her home before college.That my wife carried to term a beautiful baby girl that our doctor said would probably —and did—die during or just after childbirth haunted the two of us, and probably hastened our marriage's end. We still send each other Christmas cards, not that it matters.On both sides of the family, I am first-born. How fun it is to watch THOSE DVD's. Danny scurrying about in full panicmode, trying to unzip himself out of one of my skin tight mini dresseswithout ripping it to shreds! Trying to unhook his bra with one handand his garter belt with the other! All without snagging my nylons,mind you! Stashing my clothes under his bed or in the back of hiscloset in a heap before scrambling to the bathroom where he jumps intothe shower so he can scrub away any traces of the make-up he'dappropriated from my vanity.For an even funner time I'd innocently ask Mom while the three of uswould be preparing dinner, "Have you seen my red spandex mini? Ireally wanted to wear it tonight."Of course I was talking about the same dress Danny had worn that day andwhich he'd hurriedly stashed away.Mom would reply, just as innocently, "Sorry, Elizabeth, I must haveforgotten to pick it up from the cleaners. You'll have to wearsomething else."Oh how I'd pout and fume over Mom's 'forgetfulness'. On the other.
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