Papa Charles sat at one end of the table, with his mug of Irish coffee. I’m surprised he stuck around but glad he did. Momma sat beside him, looking like a sexy Christmas elf in a new house gown. I took my seat with Grace on my left and Momma to my right. Our eleven year old son, David sat on Papa Charles’ left with Adam, his nine year old brother sitting beside him. Across from Adam, and beside Grace was Alice, eight years old and already a princess in her brother’s eyes. Little Bella climbed into Grace’s lap to dig into a pile of mashed taters with both hands. “And what were you two doing under the mistletoe?” Momma asked. I shrugged. “Just telling Gracie a Christmas story.” Grace giggled. “A sexy Christmas story.”I tickled her. “You weren’t supposed to tattle.”Momma laughed and the sound rang through the house. “I think all of Papa Jack’s stories have sex in them.” I winked at her. “Isn’t a proper story without the happy ending.”Grace squirmed in her seat and I felt her hand on. ”So the little girl goes over and asks her mother, “Mommy what is that thing hanging down under that elephant?”Her mother also not ready to have that talk told her, “That is nothing dear.” The little girl not satisfied goes back to her father and said, “Mommy says that thing is nothing!”The father smugly replies “Well that’s because she’s been spoiled!”✧ ✧ ✧Why does an elephant have four feet?Because he’d look silly with only six inches.✧ ✧ ✧What do elephants have for lunch? A half-hour, like everyone else.✧ ✧ ✧First elephant: “I hear you’ve been tracing your ancestors on the internet.” Second elephant: “Yes, and it’s a mammoth task.”✧ ✧ ✧Husbands will be husbands... A man was sitting reading his papers when his wife hit him round the head with a frying pan.‘What was that for?’ the man asked.The wife replied ‘That was for the piece of paper with the name Jenny on it that I found in your pants pocket’.The man then said ‘When I was at the races last week Jenny was the name of the horse.
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